Trump’s Secretive Hospital Trip Fuels Speculation About His Health


( LAUGHTER )
NOT ALL THE NEWS THIS WEEKEND WAS ABOUT IMPEACHMENT. NOT ALL THE NEWS THIS WEEKEND
WAS ABOUT IMPEACHMENT. ON SATURDAY, THE PRESIDENT MADE
AN UNSCHEDULED TRIP TO THE HOSPITAL. THE SECRETIVE NATURE OF THE
VISIT PROMPTED A LOT OF SPECULATION. WHO KNOWS THE REAL REASON, BUT
TRUMP WOULDN’T BE THE FIRST PRESIDENT TO HIDE HEALTH ISSUES:
F.D.R. HID POLIO, EISENHOWER HID A HEART ATTACK, AND LINCOLN HID
HIS SECRET SKULL REDUCTION SURGERY. ( LAUGHTER )
THAT’S WHY HE WORE THE HAT. HE HAD THE SURGERY, SO HE HAD TO
WEAR THE HAT TO COVER UP — I DON’T QUITE UNDERSTAND, EITHER. ( LAUGHTER )
I AM SINCERELY RELIEVED TO SAY THAT IT LOOKS LIKE THERE’S
NOTHING WRONG WITH THE PRESIDENT’S HEALTH. I MIGHT NOT BE TRUMP’S BIGGEST
FAN, BUT I DON’T WANT HIM TO LEAVE THE WHITE HOUSE FEET
FIRST. I WANT HANDCUFFS FIRST. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
( PIANO RIFF ) PRESS SECRETARY STEPHANIE
GRISHAM LATER EXPLAINED THAT TRUMP DECIDED TO GET PARTS OF
HIS PHYSICAL DONE EARLY BECAUSE HE HAD A “FREE WEEKEND” IN
WASHINGTON. OKAY, THAT’S THE SADDEST THING
I’VE EVER HEARD. (AS TRUMP)
“HM, I HAVE THE DAY OFF, I COULD SPEND IT WITH MY CHILDREN? NOT REALLY MY THING. MY WIFE? SHE HATES ME. MY FRIENDS? ALL IN JAIL. AH, I’LL GO TO THE HOSPITAL AND
HAVE THEM STICK ME WITH NEEDLES, JUST TO FEEL SOMETHING.” ( LAUGHTER )
GRISHAM WENT ON, EMPHASIZING THAT TRUMP IS, “HEALTHY AS CAN
BE.” ( LAUGHTER )
OKAY, BUT HOW HEALTHY CAN HE BE? HE’S A 73-YEAR-OLD INSOMNIAC WHO
EATS NOTHING BUT FAST FOOD, WHO’S AFRAID OF STAIRS. (AS TRUMP)
“WATCH OUT FOR STAIRS. THEY’RE LIKE RAMPS WITH TEETH.” IT’S TRUE. ( LAUGHTER )
TRUMP TOOK TO TWITTER TO DEFEND HIS TOTALLY NORMAL SURPRISE
CHECKUP, SAYING HE WENT TO WALTER REED AND “BEGAN PHASE ONE
OF MY YEARLY PHYSICAL.” OKAY, PHYSICALS DON’T HAPPEN IN
PHASES. ( LAUGHTER )
EVERYBODY HAS THEM. I JUST HAD ONE. MY DOCTOR NEVER SAID, “OKAY,
DROP YOUR PANTS, BEND OVER, AND TRY TO RELAX. I’LL BE BACK IN SIX MONTHS.” ( LAUGHTER )
ALL RIGHT? YEP. YEP. ( PIANO RIFF )
STAY THERE. STAY THERE. ( APPLAUSE )
TRUMP FINISHED HIS TWEET WITH, “WILL COMPLETE NEXT YEAR.” ( LAUGHTER )
YES, TRUMP’S FIRST PART OF THE PHYSICAL WAS SUCH A HIT THAT
NEXT YEAR, THEY’RE COMING OUT WITH A SEQUEL:
“COLONOSCOPY 2: 2 BLOCKED 2 SCOPE.” ( LAUGHTER )
WE’VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT.

100 Comments

  1. Total speculation here: but I think he had a panic attack.

    It wasn't the sniffles or flu, because that wouldn't be "OMG HOSPITAL NOW!"-worthy.

    The symptoms of a panic attack are akin to a heart attack, so they would rush him to the hospital thinking he is having a heart attack. He doesn't have any follow up appointments scheduled, so it was something harmless and short. Which rules out heart attack, stroke, and serious illness.

    Panic attacks don't usually last for more than a few hours. And the hospital would be able to tell the difference between a panic attack and a heart attack.

    Plus, Trump has a lot going on right now.

    I've had panic attacks. I have them almost daily. When they're really bad, it genuinely feels like you're going to die. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy

    But Trump… I wish that on him. I hope he has many, many more for what he has done to the people on the southern border. I hope he suffers a severe panic attack every day for the rest of his miserable life. He has made life worse for so many… He deserves a little suffering, especially if it is suffering is as non-lethal as a panic attack.

  2. He was bored and like a toddler, needed a ride anywhere to calm down and the only place they could realistically take him that has security already planned out is the hospital.
    AND he was too stupid to say: I went to talk to the troops/vets/constituents and talk to one or two vets being treated. Maybe get a photo op with an amputee…
    NOOOO, he says phase one of annual physical.

  3. KFC just launched new boxes of fried chicken skins. Also, Trump just had an unexpected hospital visit…

  4. He is having several soft stroke leading to permanent paralysis in the very near future.

  5. He eats like shit. Maybe McDonald’s is finally doing is a solid.🤔

  6. Trump is keeping his poor health a secret because he wants us to think he's in great shape. Who has different phases of a physical? That's the most ignorant lie to date. If his claim was "I had to do it now because I'd be to busy next year," then why say you'll finish it up next year?🙄🤔

  7. Handcuff??? no!!! ..a straight jacket ..dragged out of the front door of the WH…. him screaming irrational insults Jim Carrey style dementia… …on national TV… an a parade after!!!

  8. As the impeachment process become more threatening I have wondered what excuse Mr Trump might use to resign or withdraw his candidature from the next election. A surprise medical diagnosis would provide him with that excuse and allow him to save face. Any bets on what the diagnosis will be? (I'll put $20 on resurgent bone spurs)

  9. God bless president Trump and shame on you Colbert bad boy….

  10. They were digging so far up his ass they found Sean hannity

  11. Ugh. If he died before paying for his crimes, that would suck.
    Colbert's right. Handcuffs first!!!!!

  12. Terminal malignant narcissism.

  13. I want to see Trump super wedgie perp walked out of the W.H. — wouldn't that be a hoot !!!

  14. All the voodoo dolls out there are working, he had chest pains due to the pins.

  15. tRump leaving WH cuffed or feet first? Either is fine with me.

  16. Dear Mr President
    I know your Munchausen’s and malignant narcissism are acting up, but please get well. We don’t want you dying before you’re exposed and imprisoned.
    Yours very sincerely
    The Free World

  17. Could take him a few days to prep for a colonoscopy. We all know he's extra full of ….

  18. Hey worked for Bernie, his heart attack and hospital visit saw his popularity soar afterwards. I'll do that too.

  19. Did Colbert spend time with Epstein?

  20. naw you the real one content, and dope commentary i dont even play 2k

  21. only game i have is fifa and really only one i play and apex any way ps4 king

  22. Yes yes yes

  23. He’s finally hitting menopause.

  24. Handcuffs first

  25. Who believes that this creep had ever a physical…

  26. Trump's syphilis must be playing up again.

  27. Trump has some sort of mental condition. Dementia maybe.

  28. He is the best when it comes to trump

  29. It could have been his heart because he don't have one

  30. TRUMP2020🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸all you sad liptards know it.

  31. I bet he did to much dope and they had to Pump his stomach

  32. 😂🤣

  33. And he still has never released a legit medical report about his so called Bone Spurs. Not even the original fake one his Father helped get him. Draft Dodger n Cheat

  34. He is co-opting the the Sanders heart incident. Hoping to get a bump in the polls. Thing is however most people will celebrate any hint of illness in his case. He is a full on Narcissistic asshole. And many people find him a deplorable example of a human being.

  35. Had to pull Sessions’ tongue out of his arse

  36. hope he dies of cancer in his ass

  37. Whatever happens to Trump, I hope he stays there!!:)

  38. It is Cruel and unjust that billionaires are not paying their fair share of taxes so many loopholes for very rich individuals in this country yet yet the government is imposing taxes on those that collect Social Security retirement income this is new for the last 20 years or so" And they’re collecting taxes on the disabled as well those that have no hope for a future those who can’t walk can’t function to manage their lives yet the government takes money from their measly several hundred dollar a month disability income how sick is that. It’s time for a change that will only come with Bernie Sanders

  39. He is pregnant! His pussy missed his period.

  40. I hope he suffers in the worst way humanly possible.

  41. It's already been comical how Trumps loony Cult fan club tries to spin. Deflect and justify everything. And not forgetting all the crazy conspiracy theories

  42. If we're being honest, would we really mind all that much if he left the White House feet first?

  43. Please no one ever forget Helsinki. The most biggest disgrace and emberasment ever seen by an American president over seas. But they even tried to spin that

  44. Simpson's didn't lie. Lol

  45. Hopefully he is getting a personality transplant with a side order of reality……..

  46. 0:11 Woodrow Wilson had a debilitating stroke (one of several in his lifetime) during his presidency, requiring his wife to secretly take the reins.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Woodrow_Wilson#Ratification_debate_and_incapacity

  47. I know it’s mean to say this but it’s how I really feel…. I hope whatever it is that prompted the visit is terminal. Sorry, not sorry.

  48. If we are lucky he'lll resign for health reasons as part of a secret deal. "I won't go to jail and the world won't go to shit".

    Ramps with teeth… it's true. It's true.

  49. Who does Dump think he’s kidding? We all know if he had a free day he’d be making a beeline to Maralago or one of his other golf courses.

  50. 2:15 My BDSM Mistress, on the other hand…

  51. The syphilis ravaging the treasonous moron's small brain is getting worse, obviously!

  52. Yessssssss we all. Want him in handcuffs. If he dies normally his supporters will deify him

  53. Trump saw the success of Avengers so he decided to do his physical in phases.

  54. What he missed out on his Golf

  55. He went to the hospital to ask if he could borrow a spine, because he’s been missing his for a while now

  56. I actually think trump being impeached, then not found guilty by the republican senate, then losing in 2020 would be the best case scenario for democrats. That way he can never be the victim. If he is removed it was a “coop” or if he quites for heath reasons its also not his fault.

  57. Baby Twump is sick? AWWWWWWWWWW

  58. He had some treatement against the constipation due to turtleneck mike sticking up his ass. It's called a McConnelloscopy.

  59. an interesting thought came about while Jim Jordan asked Voker questions. That the President lifted something in favor of Ukraine. which gives the idea that Quid had happened and the payout has to be like mind control. hahaha. I guess Trump believes he is Professor X.

  60. Lying former comedians, now overpaid to continuously bash Trump.

  61. I don't care what baby Trump comes up with but no doubt is cooking up something to avoid impeachment and being convicted of criminal offences. I don't give a f–k I'd like to see the bastard in an orange jump suit serving time for his appalling criminality

  62. No you won’t have a great show tonight, nothing but Trump bashing.

  63. he just completed phase one of his YEARLY physical, and will complete it NEXT year?

  64. Well, we know Donald is notoriously OCD about cleanliness. So he is on the anxiety spectrum, and now he is being Impeached. Dude had a Panic Attack. What is more interesting is his shame about it and felt need to lie… the Perfect Check Up… hum.

  65. belief is a word that describes something, you cant dismiss it as you see fit

  66. ever heard of Pre-Meditated Murder???

  67. Im in the Army, Walter Reed is an Army hospital
    Our physicals are in phases

  68. Trump is suffering from internal cranial bone spurs. Unfortunately the US population is doing the real suffering.

  69. Trying to get some doctor to declair him sick so the public will take pitty on him over this impeachment just like mobsters used to do it in the past ,,,,it's a lie ,,,,fake illness

  70. I'm going with impacted KFC bones or Horrible Hemorrhoid Attack due to too much KFC mac and cheese. I suppose it could be those pesky bone spurs acting up again, but… naw. He can't even remember which foot it was.

  71. He may really be sick. I almost feel bad for the orange man but when I think of children in cages it goes away…
    I think he went for refills and to Demand dirt on Biden from the doctor. I could be wrong though

  72. We can only hope.

  73. How can you think trump is ok he is a mental case

  74. Don’t believe a word he says.
    Truth was he had to get the screen on his phone fixed… or no more twitter announcements.

  75. Handcuffs first, thank you!

  76. Trump went to the hospital to get more marbles. He's lost all his.

  77. THE DUMMYCRATS ARE DESPERATE AND DROWNING IN THEIR OWN STUPIDITY! LMFAO! THEY THINK TRUMP AND NOT BERNIE HAD THE CHEST CLUTCHING HEART ATTACK! LMFAO! SMH

  78. …Physicals don't work that way… And even with surgeries and checkups, you don't call them "phases".

  79. They required an MRI to check is "Ah Brain".

  80. Trumps health is better then any American

  81. Bahahahahaha no one believes him anymore. Not a fucking word that spews
    forth from his cake hole. He reminds me of the Baron Harkonnen. And I so
    wish I could add a gif here right now for those who don't know the
    Baron, lol.

  82. Bahahahahaha no one believes him anymore. Not a fucking word that spews
    forth from his cake hole. He reminds me of the Baron Harkonnen. And I so
    wish I could add a gif here right now for those who don't know the
    Baron, lol.

  83. There are TWO WAYS to be sick. One is confirmed a VERY LONG TIME AGO. The other might be because the first one is getting too much.

  84. Trump probably had a panic attack

  85. Which would happen first
    Impeachment or death by fast food lol

  86. The White House press Corp
    can't even tell the truth why
    Trump was rushed to the
    hospital ???🤔 🆘

  87. I feel this show a couple months ago became a soap opera.

  88. He's turned a peculiar shade of yellow, has the thinning hair of a Chernobyl resident , and can't hold his bladder ( or is it the other way around) ?
    Plus he ordered Russian Take out from KRISPY KREMLIN !! 😶

  89. He's going to get part two of his ANNUAL physical next YEAR. Who the hell in their right mind would take this guy at his word?

  90. limp d1ck and heathburn from eating so much Bs isn't a good enough excuse to skip hearings.

  91. they found a peach stone blocking his gall bladder.

  92. Hello yes he have tacos. Saludos

  93. Bless his heart

  94. God is calling him. They need to talk.

  95. His herpetrumps acting up.

  96. Now, now play nice. Trump is in…… . ………………….. … .

  97. Trump was not pronounced dead at Walter Reed. There must not be a God.

  98. He's as healthy as a horse. Putin's horse. He gets ridden all the time.

  99. Plunger! CODE
    hell what color code.????…….. No. No. No color code! Every pun intended.

  100. Is trump ok? Nothing a little death wouldn’t cure.

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