5 Ways to Synchronize Your Healthy Lifestyle As A Couple | For Today’s Aging Community



hello and welcome to our Friday afternoon a live chat on if you're joining us live welcome if you are joining us on the rebroadcast we also welcome you as well we know not everyone is available to make our live broadcast so we always want to make sure that we make these broadcasts available to you as we broadcast both on Facebook and on YouTube so on Fridays we have just started a new series of for today's aging community and Michael and I are coming together to share some of the things that we have either struggled with and overcome or some things or information or tidbits of stuff right yeah conversation about things that are applicable to today's aging community and specifically as families and couples today we're going to be talking about five ways you can synchronize your healthy lifestyle as a couple and some of the things that Michael and I have gone through on our journey from where we were when I was sick and where Michael is today with me on the journey and how we have really melded that into our lifestyle for us as a couple and beyond that as well with our children so again welcome we always like they'd like to ask that if you're joining us on YouTube you do take a second to hit that subscribe button that way you will be notified when we go live and or this is uploaded as a rebroadcast and the same for Facebook please hit that like button always free feel free to leave a comment as we are going through the discussion we also like to open up the conversation at the end for you to jump in with us and share with us what you are doing as a family and/or a couple or if you have a question or need some help or advice we're here for that as well so Michael and I have been on this journey as a married couple now for almost 19 years 20 years almost 20 years almost was a married couple 19 19 yeah 19 we're doing some fact-checking here um it's been a long time and we have gone through a lot of life changes as most people do who are married not all of them have been easy to navigate but the one thing that we have always really been consistent with is Arc as a couple to stay healthy and fit for our marriage for us as a couple for our kids so that we can stay happy healthy and energetic for them and then we always talked about the fact that we also want to be happy and healthy and energetic and have our wits about us for our grandkids as well Michael and I were both very um middle to late age range before having our kids we were I was 34 he was 36 when we had Logan and then 40 and 42 and we had Gabby so we were on the older age which now is pretty normal so it's not that big of a deal um so it's more than more of the norm today that people are having their kids later in life but it's still when you start doing the math and counting forward does seem a little scary so for us to have the commitment to really stay healthy as we go through these stages in life has really been a commitment for us but we always have not been on the same page so we're gonna share with you the five things that we find to be really important to put into place and practice to really be able to synchronize what it is that you want to do with your spouse as you're going through this aging process and how you can really coordinating lifestyle together so that you're going through it together and you're not kind of going on in the opposite direction so Michael why don't you share what the first tip is that we have well like you said getting on the same page we definitely have not always been on the same page when it came to our health and fitness I think pretty close because we you know we were interested in you know eating healthy foods we were we were both interested in exercise we were both interested and living a healthy life but it didn't always jive with us trying to commit to doing that together like as a team and having some cohesiveness like with our relationship and with our with our everything we're doing our health it wasn't always we didn't always see eye to eye on everything but I think over the years what we've done is we've we've really like done some things like that we do together and not so much you know I'm to go in this direction you're going that door and I think early on well I know early on like years ago we were listening to positive some kind of positive motivational thing and they and they talked about designing your perfect day like and what is your perfect day and we thought well that's interesting let's do it so she went they went to a separate room than what I was in and we both broke down what our perfect day looked like and we came back and that perfect day look the same things almost exactly the same to both of us are like wow okay like that's interesting like we know like how we want our day to be designed so we kind of kicked off like everything that we did like as far as the way we ate our exercise routines everything we we kind of jive those together when you say yeah yeah better so and in when we were on different paths we were always headed in the same direction we were just going about it in different lanes so to speak so never anything that was combative or totally opposite of each other that we were just kind of taking our individual personal route to get to what we want for ourselves which is a healthy aging process and not being injured and being able to maintain our physical fitness we were just doing it in different lanes and so when we did design our perfect day which if you haven't done this with your spouse or even like your best friend maybe here's something it's a really fun exercise to do and you have to do it in separate areas of wherever you are so that you don't you know talk about it and you literally just brained up what you want your day to be from how you wake up and what you do when you wake up and you know do you work out do you not work out you watch the morning news you read a book do you pray like what is it that you do and how do you want your course of your day to roll out and it's amazing when two people can come together and have that come out and be scripted so identical or so perfect to one another and so we went oh okay wait a second why are we not combining our interests and our goals together to get in the same lane on the path to where we want to end up and what we really started doing that I think that's where we not only came together health-wise but we also came together a little bit more tightly as a married couple as well because now we have these new common interests that we always had we had just never discussed or committed to one another with and so I think that's the second thing is really committing as a team and really having each other's back and so if you've been in our intermittent fasting for today aging aging woman course you know we have the little Johnny role and I won't go into what that is but we just have each other's back and we have cones and we have signals and we have predetermined things that we discuss before we go to a party or before we go to a restaurant or before we go to a neighborhood barbecue and we say what is our expectation for ourselves when we're there and we set that up before we leave and then we back each other up when we're there and if you are trying to live a specific lifestyle that maybe doesn't jive with the average or doesn't jive with people in your community or your social circle you have to have someone who's got your back and you have to have someone that's gonna stand next to you and make the same sort of decisions that you are and I don't want to say compromises but I would say healthy choices or life choices with you because then you feel a little more empowered and you really feel strong in your conviction about the choices that you're making because you're not standing alone and Michael and I have always been very firm on that we're we're together as a team and because we already completed step one which was designing our day and designing our life getting to step two was really easy because we knew going out the door to whatever it was we were going to do socially we have the same plan in place so now all we have to do is be teammates and back each other up and then just model each other's behavior based on the decisions that we've made before we have left the house so working as a team is step number two yeah working as a team yeah and just to elaborate on that a little bit more like when it comes to tech team I heard a guy on the radio on the radio yesterday kind of blew me away he was talking about the response to kind of woman he wants to marry and and they were having this discussion about she should do more of the housework in him and and like if she's pregnant she still should do a but I was just like shaking my head like do what world are you living in Cali you're gonna knock over computer girl what world are you living in cuz these days it just doesn't go down like that bro and if you if you haven't been married yet you got a lot to learn because we do a lot of tag team and it's not gender specific what we do in our house like Diane can trust that I'm gonna get the laundry done and she's gonna ride and make Gabby's lunch and we're gonna in it all plays into our no trouble rolling out a trash can to the street michael has some no trouble washing dishes and it plays a big part of our healthy lifestyle because like if you talk about working out like we know like okay we got a lot of stuff going on in the morning and it's like okay we got to get lunch made for Gabby we're gonna work out we're gonna you know get to trash out we got to feed the dog we got we got to get on the computers we got emails and stuff a good answer he's like we have a lot of things going on and like if we don't divide and conquer sometimes we're gonna get conquered so we're like we're on it that way so so to elaborate on what you were saying and then number three is think beyond today so for us I mean you've guys that are in this community know that we talk we speak a lot about how we're living for our future grandkids so you know I used to work out to be more vain like I wanted to have you know be big and be the biggest guy you know in the room and be in good shape and all that but now it's not about being vain it's about where are we going with this like I want to be able to push myself up off the floor if I fall down you know when I'm 75 I want to be able to play me and you know be able to play with grandkids and run around and throw a baseball or do whatever and don't feel like well I'm you know I'm supposed to be this I'm you know 75 and I can't you know do anything I can't go for a walk I can't no we don't want to live that life we want to travel we want to have be out there with our future grandkids and kids and and and that's what we look forward to when we look beyond like what we're doing today like if you think about going to work out or eating kale for dinner or whatever but they all that's kind of a drag I'd rather have XYZ to eat and I'd rather not work out I'd rather have a beer much tea TV on the sofa like yeah who doesn't want to do that more than workout but if you're thinking beyond today it kind of motivates you to like oh we're getting it done we're gonna go get it done this morning I'm gonna get a workout we're gonna eat right we're gonna live clean we're gonna get a lot of sleep I'm gonna drink enough water we're gonna do all those things and do it not just for you and I think that's where the couple part comes in is not be so turned in that all you're thinking about is what you want but what can you do for your spouse as well so you know if Michael throws his back out trying to be some macho guy in the gym I'm screwed because now everything's left up to me and I have a husband who's laid out that now I have to care for and vice versa if I go do some crazy thing on the treadmill or go out on some long run and hurt myself um then he's stuck with having to pick up my loose end so thinking about your your spouse or your significant other is really key in this as well when you're thinking beyond today and do where do we want to be 10 years from now I don't want to have to have my knees replaced I don't want to have to have my hips replaced I don't want to you know be laid out because of a back injury so we're really aware of what we're doing on a daily basis as well to make sure that we're still in the game not only for ourselves but for each other so that we don't become a burden um and that's another one of our big goals when we think about the end in mind is we don't want to be a burden for anyone we want to be a joy and we want to be active participants and we don't want the responsibility of our care landing in someone else's Hey if we can avoid it so every decision we make now is has that in its consideration process of where will that lead us down the road and if it doesn't seem like it's gonna lead us in a good place then we usually take a different route so so thinking about thinking beyond today is key as well not only for yourself but for your spouse as well and then keeping communication open this is crucial especially when you have your hands in a lot of different areas of life or you're wearing a bunch of different hats so you know he's dead a mom he can be mom and sometimes I could be dead we both work we have our own businesses we have friends we have other responsibilities that we have to take care of and so if you don't keep the lines of communication open there could be some assumptions and we all know it happens when we assume too many things that can fall into place that could really cause some miscommunication some hurt feelings and some stomped on ego so we really do try to keep the communication open about how we're gonna plan out our day and what it is that we want for ourselves so if I'm feeling like I need to do something specific with my nutrition I have to tell Michael that so if he's making dinner he doesn't you know if let's say I'm having a vegan week or something and he's responsible for making dinner and he lays out some salmon like I could automatically be offended or have my feelings hurt because he made salmon when I'm having a vegan week but if I didn't tell him I was going vegan this week how would he know and so keeping the lines of communication open for and about what your goals are and what you need to get done in a day is really important because we are busy and when you don't communicate that's when feelings do get hurt and then if you don't work through those feelings and get trapped down inside that we know how that ends up being a big problem especially in marriages and so communicate and like Michael mentioned about the morning routine that we have like we have it set out like there are just some mornings where I get Gabi up I get lunch made I take care of the dog I get Gabi to school because Michael needs to work out cuz he has a busy day and then he always returns the favor for me as well where he'll take the role of getting Gabi up and taking care of the dog and getting her off to school so I can work out I have a busy day and then there's those beautiful days where we can work out together and so he wouldn't know that and I wouldn't know that if we didn't keep our lines of communication open and that really does help prevent feelings from being hurt and then getting yourself into a situation where you're fighting about something today that happened five years ago um and no one even knows why it is that you're mad so keep those lines of communication open as well that's for healthy relationships in general and number five is trust and accountability this is a big one because I know you know there's a very huge strong possibility that I'm not gonna work out in the morning if she grabs me and says oh and I'll come back to bed like you know if I'm supposed to be hitting my workout that morning then I'm probably gonna roll back over and like okay I'll just do it later and it's the same we're staying up late at night yeah sitting up late yes yeah it's so easy like I mean I can do it to her I could be like hey let's get into show whole and watch you know whatever it is we're watching on Netflix currently let's just do one more well if I do that you know her trust in me she's gonna just give in to it probably be like okay just one more and before you know it you know you're up till 1:00 in the morning you're tired and you know so that workout the more is not gonna happen if you're munching on something on the couch which we tend to try to avoid at night then then your your double guilty of not getting your workout you stayed up late you munched on something you know so some trust and accountabilities is huge in a lot of ways I know the other day when we were working out I told Diane I was gonna get Gabi ups cuz her work I was longer than mine so I was gonna hit that time right when I was you know was my responsibility to get her up and I saw her leave the room I thought she was going like oh god he must have forgot and she was going to kick it but she wasn't going to get Gabi she was just going to use the bathroom but it just crossed my mind that there's I mean there's where you gotta have trust me guys she has her trust that I'm gonna and she was trusting by the way that I was gonna get her up but it just made me think about that point you know having trusted accountability it's so important that you know it's that could totally ruin her workout that she knows she was gonna have a our workout 45-minute workout and now she's got a cut of court cut it short but she thinks maybe it's possible that I forgot to go wake up Gavin you know yeah and the key to all of this is really um if you have a certain lifestyle that you're trying to live communicate that with your spouse or your significant other let them know what it is that you're wanting to do for yourself and ask them to join you on your journey if they're not interested you have to respect that as well but just don't communicate what it is that you need and ask them to support you because not every couple is going to design their day exactly the same we got really lucky and then just always make sure you keep the lines of communication open you keep the trust and accountability open and then make sure that you're not sabotaging someone else's desires to live a healthy life and that you're not allowing someone else to do that to you as well and then find some some peace and harmony in it and then when you do finally get to that point because I know there's a lot of couples in this community where wives have gone through the intermittent fasting for today's Asian woman of course and now the husbands are jumping on board and they're going through the course with them and they're changing and seeing amazing results as well another walking through this lifestyle together is create some great opportunity for some dates and some new activities that you can bring in and some cooking classes or have some fun in the kitchen designing some new things to create for your family and this lifestyle really should be looked at in that way and in a way that you can bring some joy and some light and some newness to a relationship where maybe you are just kind of you know tired and not having anything to look forward to incorporating a healthy lifestyle can be considered a habit and a really great way to bring some fun into your relationship with your partner as well and then guess what your kids are watching you too so they're probably going to pick up on some habits whether they're still living with you or they're not even maybe some grandkids will be picking up on some stuff so let me see if we have any questions or comments I have to rush out of here today to go pick up our sweets Gabby from school and since you guys are always interested in our kids we want to share that our sweet little Gabby she had a track and field event this week which got froze out it was absolutely freezing and they cancelled it but she also competed in a choir competition this week at school and her choir team took first place so we're super proud of that little girl and all the amazing things that she is doing in and for herself in her life so doesn't look I have any comments here on Facebook that I can see let me see if we have anything over on YouTube and if not we are going to jump off and go pick up our sweet girl make sure the volume does it pop up on here let's see let's see okay YouTube let's see Valerie hi from Florida broke my arm yesterday it's the perfect time for me to start the new course and it's the perfect time for you to start a new course over you can rest and you can enjoy the energized sense of calm and fasting does help your body heal so hopefully we'll be able to get you through that little broken arm incident pretty quickly and get you back up and running before you know of it yeah great great outlook take advantage of the downtime and really sink into the course and practice what you're learning Darlene good stuff glad you joined us Candi car um um let's see Naja listening from Utah welcome girlfriend and Cathleen always good to have you as well okay a couple of announcements really quick and then we're gonna jump off intermittent fasting for today's Asian women course registration closes tomorrow morning at about 9:00 a.m. Central Standard Time our new course starts tomorrow with a live welcome a QA at 10:00 a.m. and then the master class series and community is open for enrollment if you already graduate check your eat in box with your emails I will be sending out an email either this afternoon or tomorrow with the invite for that in registration for that will close on Monday so we're gonna open it and close it pretty quickly anything else we want to talk about know if you are struggling to find some harmony and peace in your home or your relationship with trying to create a healthy lifestyle for you mark for yourself and your family please consider incorporating these five tips to get you there one design your perfect day write it out brain dump it create it as if it is happening include as many details as possible invite your spouse to do the same and then combine your perfect days to see if you can create something that you can both work with to tag-team as a couple whether you're in social situations and especially around your home to make sure the burden of responsibility around the home is shared equally so no one has to sacrifice what it is that they want for themselves to take care of the responsibilities around the home number three think beyond today what do you want your life to be like with your spouse 5 10 15 20 years from now and are you doing the things today to make sure that that's going to happen for you number 4 keep communication open don't assume things make sure you are clear with what it is that you need and support from your spouse make sure you're clear about what it is that you want for yourself that way you're not stepping on each other's toes and then you have to build in some trust and accountability if you are giving responsibility up for something that you're used to doing in your home to your spouse you have to trust that they are going to in fact get it done and one thing that Michael and I have really had to come to grips with is that he can make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and I can make a peanut butter and jelly sounds we may go about it different ways but in the end it's always going to be a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and sometimes we have to walk away and understand that our spouse is just gonna do things differently than we are as long as the end result is the same that's all you need to worry about so I hope this helps you design a an amazing healthy lifestyle for you and your household in your space we won't be here next Friday oh no we won't be here next Friday because we might I don't know if we're gonna be here next week at all or no we won't be here the week after that because we are going to spring on spring break with our kids we're going back home to Kentucky to go visit Michael's family so we're really excited if I thought the kids are gonna get to meet their grandmother and some cousins and stuff like that so we'll be gone for sure next Friday and next month the Monday after next Friday and then Wednesday is up in the air so because we don't know what we're doing for spring break for the kids but we'll be here Monday and Wednesday next week have a super fantastic weekend this is a great weekend a project get some paper off get some pen and didn't have a great conversation with your spouse over a cup of black coffee and a bill bottle of water how great weekend great weekend

2 Comments

  1. I love how you two are as a couple. My husband and I share some of the home responsibilities. But we also have an agreement that I make the meals and he fixes what needs fixing in the house. He's not on board with my diet & exercise, although he likes to go on walks. He hates veggies so I do my best to feed him right. He loves pasta so I make my own sauce, etc. Our meals are usually totally different.

  2. Hey!! It's Kristi!! I already know this is going to be exactly perfect!!!!

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